Today was one of those days which remind Torontonians just how narrow our summer beaching window is. And, really, living in the Yonge-Bloor neighbourhood really does lend itself to Getting The Fuck Out Of The Yonge-Bloor Neighbourhood, especially when, the day before, you actually witnessed a 60something crazywoman hiking up her spandex miniskirt to slide backwards down the stairway railing at Manulife Centre.
Without underwear. And clearly not having trimmed the bush, so to speak, in over a dozen years.
I kid you not. People put their hands on that railing.
Anyway, as you might expect, this sunny and hot morning required an early rise and visit to the gym, after which Champ trundled off home to study — “I’m trying to get an education so I can get into a good college, it’s not fair!” (YouTube) — while I pedaled down Bay Street to the ferries. Heh.
Twenty minutes later, the packed ferry nudged the Hanlan’s Point dock. And ten minutes after that I was hanging on the beach and applying sunscreen with the dead-sexy T and B and J and L and M and J and the super-dead-sexy A. Everyone seemed to be sporting new Speedos for this year, despite the clothing-optional nature of the beach. Tanlines, baby, tanlines.
And two hours later the sky blackened and it pissed rain and the beach got very chilly. As in shrinkage-danger-chilly, so we doffed our swim trunks, yanked on our briefs and shorts and dashed for shelter.
The rain was so cool on the hot asphalt roadway that the normally-steamy statue of Ned Hanlan was shrouded in, well, steam.
And hundreds huddled under the island terminal until the next boat arrived to return us to the mainland. I think we were the smart ones, as we got on the first boat. The rest of the beachers would be waiting with the cyclists from the CMWC race and nothing bugs more than waiting in line, especially when you’re wet and cold and there’s no one to cuddle with (that you’re at liberty to post about here, anyway) and you just want to get back home.
But, more than anything, it was a reminder for Torontonians to grab absolutely every opportunity to enjoy the summer. Because, man, it’s brutally short here.
Hanlan’s Point, Toronto Island (2PM, 15 June 2008)
(photo courtesy the aforementioned Mr. T)
15 comments
Oh, my.
You know, my city has long summers and some of the best beaches in the world (no ferries required). Just if you want to, you know, share the bounty of your ridiculously hot eye candy self a little more globally.
*cough*
I can never touch that Manulife stairway railing. Ever. Again.
Ever.
On the other hand (literally), I’d be happy to help you with your lotion-spreading needs, especially somewhere that was clothing-optional
And where are the photos of T, B, J, L, M, J and A? Hmm?
Aw, shucks you guys.
And, David D, it’s the railing on the east side, going up the stairs, not the steps down to The Ugliest Supermarket Customers in Toronto. That said, I’m not using any railing anywhere from now on. I’d rather fall down a flight of concrete steps than… ugh.
Okay, a couple of things about T, B, J, L, M, J and A: Firstly, these guys are all very out and proud and all that, so I don’t want my anonymizing of their names to be construed as any sort of closetiness on their parts. I’ve done so for the same reason you’ll see Champ mentioned here as… Champ. They haven’t asked to be dragged into this dirty blogging business and I have no intention of doing just that.
Also, on Hanlan’s Point, there are strict prohibitions regarding photography, so to get that shot we had to position very obviously so as to have no one in the background. Herding sun-starved homosexuals into a group photo on the beach is like herding cats, yo. I mean, you might as well give up before starting.
I didn’t read this article yet. Just looked down quickly for the speedo shot. Was not disappointed.
Why do you tease us with your package of love? I actually took a ferry this weekend as well to Orcas Island, WA, to have a lovely weekend on the deck with good friends. A nice beach day yesterday on the island and I wore my new Aussie Bum board shorts. Today is beautiful here in Seattle, I can see the Mtn from my office window as I write.
You look fantastic..dayum..I am working on it at 44.
John in Seattle
thanks for the great rack pix!
Stopping by here is always a bright spot in the daily surf.
I have to say I enjoy reading your blog, a mutual friend shared it with me a few months ago. Plus I would like to recommend more shirtless/speedos pictures of you, you are one sexy Canadian. Todd from NYC
Wow. If I had your body, I would be mostly naked 24-7. Truly makes me ill.
And we are having a short summer here– but with no lake or beach. It makes tanning difficult to say the least.
And I do believe in tanlines too! Its just that my untanned region is so much LARGER than yours– and not in a good way.
Oh. My.
First time I have ever approved of a man wearing a Speedo.
I do believe I have come down with a case of the vapors.
My amigo Scooter in Brooklyn led me here.
I had something very clever and Texan (yes, occasional they do jibe) to say while reading the post.
Then I came to the pix.
All things clever and Texan went out the window except this:
“Si Se Puede! “
Cookie Mueller AND a Speedo shot?
Can a Monday get any better?
You are a dreamboat and Champ is Divine. Point wonderfully, wonderfully made.
Geez, you guys. Thanks.
Thank you for that speedo pic, Brett. This helps me in case I get you a pair of pants; I can tell the tailor you dress to the right.
Just stopping by to say Hiya!
Speedo’s usually creep me out. I’ve seen too many chubby Italians wearing them.
But my eyes are unharmed.