Take Your Ball and Go Home

20Jul06

Don’t read this, Mom.

I know, I know, I’m totally late to the party on this, but amid all the brouhaha over Lance Armstrong’s painfully lame, homophobic-fratboy, anal-sex “joke” at Jake Gyllenhaal’s expense at last week’s ESPY Awards (see clip below), there seemed to be, I dunno, something missing.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=opyhfHax4vI[/youtube]

I thought it odd that no one pointed out that worse than the joke itself was Armstrong’s predictable (and even lamer) backpedalling (heh, get it?), suggesting that those who thought he was actually referring to Gyllenhaal enjoying penetration by another man were “sick people”. Because, golly, even the idea of Jake Gyllenhaal taking it in the stern is sick.

You know, for someone who spends vast amounts of time with (and who owes his entire fortune and notoriety to) a long, stiff object rubbing up against his manhole, repeatedly grinding against his anus while surrounded by muscular and sweaty men, Lance Armstrong has a lot of ball, casting aspersions on those who do exactly the same for a lot less money and no celebrity at all. Douchebag.

Filed under: 3 Kinds of Gay, Bad Behaviour, Celebrities, Stupidity |

6 Responses to “Take Your Ball and Go Home”

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1 bstewart23 on Jul 20th, 2006 said:

…and, is it just me, or does Lance Armstrong look like he’s really, really enjoying his good friend (and biking buddy) Jake Gyllenhaal’s company?
2 no wonder sheryl split on Jul 21st, 2006 said:

omg, yeah. i mean i woulda gone with the first joke, it was stupid but kinda funny in a wordplay way, but then ‘the sick’ part really showed his colours….
3 Unfamous on Jul 21st, 2006 said:

I think Mr. Armstrong prefers his special friend Matthew McConaughey
4 bstewart23 on Jul 22nd, 2006 said:

Not as much as McConaughey prefers himself.
5 Al on Jul 27th, 2006 said:

“A lot of ball” just about killed me.
6 Mr Skin on Oct 5th, 2006 said:

Jake is so hot! Anybody know what his next film will be?